It was a phase in life where I worked a lot. We had bought a nearly 100-year-old house in need of renovation. Our vision was to create a home, and at the same time, a place for inner and spiritual development. After the purchase, there was no money left, so we had no choice but to do everything ourselves.

For seven years, I did almost nothing but work and pray. 

After work, I would immediately put on my work clothes and work until I was exhausted – usually until 10 PM. We replaced almost everything except for the bricks and beams.

After a few years, I felt under pressure. I was already in my late 50s and desperately wanted to do something for God. But the workload was so enormous that everything seemed to drag on endlessly.

Over and over, I asked God what I could do for Him in this situation.

Then He gave me a message.

I had a dream with unusually clear images. In the dream, I was applying for a job at a company. It was still unclear which position I would get. I was shown various tasks – office work or technical duties. But none of them particularly excited me.

In a longer silent prayer, something suddenly happened. 

I had an insight - not just an intellectual realization, but a small enlightenment. 

It came over me as if from nowhere. 

Initially, it was without content, a pure spiritual experience that came from a depth one begins to sense in nothingness. A moment later, it became a clear sentence:

"I am not an employer! I just want to be present through you!”

This message overwhelmed me emotionally. Even today, I get tears in my eyes when I think about it. It completely changed my perspective.

God did not want someone to work for Him - yet that was the relationship I had lived with Him. I had treated Him like an employer for whom I could work to earn His reward. I believed I could satisfy Him if I accomplished enough.

But God shook me awake from this limited concept. That was not the relationship He wanted with me.

God wants to live within us. God wants to manifest Himself through us.

This insight changed my feeling toward God. 

No longer was the pressure to accomplish something in order to make God happy the focus. Instead, my focus became preparing myself and opening up so that God could dwell in me.

If God wants to be present through me, then He can be at any moment – whether I'm knocking plaster off the walls, sitting on the toilet, going for a walk, or talking to someone.

It is not the external action that matters, but my consciousness and my love for God in every moment.

What I can do for God no longer comes from my reasoning and planning, but unfolds in my heart in every moment of my life.

Every moment becomes an expression of being and acting in the sense of God.

When we embark on the path to God through the search for truth and a specific image of God, we often form an idea of Him. Our relationship with God then takes shape according to this image.

However, on the mystical path, we seek a direct experience with God through prayer - and there were several surprises for me along the way.

At the beginning of our prayer life, we turn to God, much like speaking with another person. We have a counterpart to whom we express ourselves and expect a response.

But have you ever thought about how it is possible to be one with God while also relating to another person?

We cannot pray to God and speak with someone at the same time – that would divide our attention. That would be unbearable.

However, the relationship with God is completely different from that with a person.

God does not manifest as a conversational partner in the conventional sense, but as a new feeling in our hearts. 

One might call it resonance - a deep inner vibration in which we feel God within us. We do not communicate with God through thoughts or words, but experience Him directly through this inner feeling.

In this way, we are able to give a person our full attention without losing the closeness and connection to God for even a second.

When a person loves us, they can be there for us, hug us, listen to us attentively, give us something, support and defend us.

Compared to the love that God wants to give us, that is still very little. God goes one significant step further. 

He wants to dwell within us. 

He wants to become one with you personally with the most precious thing He has - His heart.

It is the greatest appreciation imaginable, the greatest attention possible, the greatest devotion conceivable, and the greatest gift that exists in this universe.

He wants to offer everything to us.

In an important mystical speech where Sun Myung Moon explains the zero-point standard, he also speaks about revelations. He gives some examples of how they are conveyed.

On a January 1st, I had a dream of Sun Myung Moon. It was very vivid and real, and I felt very close to him. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, and I sat across from him in the same posture. Then I took his hand and looked at it closely.

I said to him: "A good hand." He replied: "Good hand – good heart." Then he took my hand and said: "Also a good hand." 

And with that, the dream was over.

It was 3 a.m., and I couldn't sleep anymore. So I got dressed and went for a walk in the park. There, I saw a rabbit - and then another one. Somehow it felt special. It's not unusual to see rabbits at night, but more and more appeared, until eventually there were five.

Five rabbits! 

Suddenly, a shiver ran through me, and I recognized the parallel:

A hand has five fingers – and now these five rabbits. 

Additionally, the number 5 represents a human being – four limbs and the head. I immediately remembered that Sun Myung Moon once said that rabbits are a good sign of promise.

An internally very challenging year followed. 

The year that followed was very challenging inwardly.

Yet during that time, I kept seeing a rabbit – and each time, shortly afterward, something good happened in connection with my mystical work.

For example, the first unexpected contacts developed. I was able to move people in conversations who then organized the first workshop. Also, before the first trial workshop with my family, I again saw a rabbit. Throughout the year, these related phenomena occurred.

These events were always related to the new mystical approach and the intention to pass on my experiences.

Before the workshop, I strangely had the recurring thought that I must not die before the workshop. This event was of great importance for my mission. I strongly felt that I had to pass on the experiences and the message that God had given me to the next generation. 

The question arose within me: Would I be willing to die for this?

I told myself: If I die after the workshop, it's not so bad - but not before. Somehow, the theme of dying or not dying before this workshop became an intense inner struggle.

When I finally conducted the first workshop, I suddenly experienced cold sweats and chest pains during the following night – a sensation I had never felt before.
I feared it might be a heart attack, and my son drove me to the hospital. I was examined throughout the night, but it turned out that my heart was completely fine. Relieved, I walked home at 5 a.m.

Thanks to some videos we had recorded during the trial workshop, I was able to take a short break and still complete the workshop fully.

The following night, I again had intense dreams and was wide awake at 3 a.m. Then I felt an inner call from Sun Myung Moon to go outside. 

So I went for another walk, but this time I felt strongly that I should take a different path.

On this path, I then found €50. 

I was surprised and immediately thought again of the number five. I interpreted it as a sign that the five promises had been fulfilled with this workshop.

These experiences show how events, dreams, and enlightenments interact and become messages.

God can guide and teach us through such means.

In the past, I often had doubts and made sure not to overvalue such events. But through my more intense prayer life, my spiritual sensitivity has further opened. 

Additionally, there was the aspect of enlightenment, which has enormous intensity – so much so that I can no longer deny the connections.